The Issue With “Feel Your Feelings”
Navigating Emotions: Feeling Without Overwhelming:
Emotions are an integral part of the human experience. They color our days, adding depth to our joys and sorrows. It's often said, "Feel your feelings to get through it," and acknowledging our emotions is essential for growth and healing. However, it's crucial to understand that embracing your emotions doesn't mean they should overwhelm you. This blog will explore the delicate balance of feeling your feelings while avoiding emotional overwhelm. We'll also discuss techniques and the role of trauma therapy when emotions become too much to bear. There is a crucial difference between feelings and emotions. Feelings are a combination of emotions (what your heart emotes) and thoughts (interpretations, perspectives, a way of narrating the experience with the emotion). For example, I could feel like I’m being ignored (which is an internal narration-thought) and have the emotion of sadness or emotional pain. We often need to tease apart the difference so we are not deeply and painfully internalizing what might be a damaging or unhelpful thought or experience of self.
The Importance of Feeling Emotions:
Before delving into managing emotions, let's emphasize the importance of feeling them. Emotions are messengers, carrying valuable information about our inner world. They guide us, providing insights into our needs, desires, and boundaries. Acknowledging, accepting, experiencing, and processing emotions can lead to personal growth, better relationships, and enhanced self-awareness.
Avoiding Emotional Suppression:
Suppressing emotions, on the other hand, can be detrimental. It's like sweeping dust under the rug; it might seem tidy for a while, but eventually, the dust accumulates, creating a mess that's even harder to clean up. In the short term, suppressing emotions can increase stress, anxiety, and even physical health issues. In the long run, it can contribute to emotional numbness and a sense of disconnection from oneself.
The Balance: Experiencing Emotions Without Overwhelming:
So, how do we balance feeling emotions and avoiding being overwhelmed? It begins with self-awareness. Recognizing when you're experiencing intense emotions is the first step. From there, you can employ various techniques to manage these feelings in a healthy way.
Techniques for Managing Emotions:
Mindfulness: Mindfulness practices, such as meditation and deep breathing, can help you stay present with your emotions without getting swept away. They create a space for you to observe your feelings without judgment.
Emotional Regulation: Learn to identify and label your emotions accurately. This can reduce the intensity of overwhelming feelings. For instance, saying, "I am anxious" rather than "I am a wreck" helps you pinpoint the emotion and address it more effectively.
Journaling: Writing down your emotions and the events or thoughts triggering them can provide clarity. It's a way to externalize your feelings and gain perspective.
Seek Support: Don't hesitate to reach out to a therapist or counselor if your emotions become too overwhelming. Trauma therapy, in particular, can be instrumental in processing deep-seated emotional wounds.
The Role of Trauma Therapy:
Sometimes, intense and overwhelming emotions are a sign of unresolved trauma. Evidence-based Trauma therapy, such as Written Exposure Therapy (5 sessions vs 20), can help individuals work through traumatic experiences. These therapies provide structured approaches to processing trauma and healing emotional wounds.
